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The Year 20,000 (Humorous Speech for Toastmasters Competation)

Imagine that today is January 1st, of the year 20,000. That's ONLY 18,000 years from now. It is a blink of an eye.  it is even quicker, it is just half a blink conditioned that you never open your eyes again. LOL
if earth makes it that far, you’ll be there... but you’ll be completely transformed:
Heavy people will turn into heavy oil,
light people will be light oil,
and gassy will be the source of natural gas. :D

You guys thought you will retired at 60, huh?  :D

So, what are some of the awaited changes that will happen?
1- For starter, Dammam and Khobar (two cities that full of traffic and detours) will be detours-free but based on my experience, Jubail- Dhahran highway will be still under-construction  (The highway always under construction)  :D even though we will be working from home by then.
2- Saudi Women will be finally on the driver seat but cars will be self-driven. :D
But according to a visionary professional, my optician :D Cars will no longer exist. The reason they won't exist is: "humans’ population". Think about it. If population continue to grow at the same rate as it is now, The population will reach a number that I called "Hassan" for discovering it  :D: represented by 1 followed by 34000 zeros. That’s more than the number of atoms on the universe.
Logically, Earth will get extremely heavy and fall off the solar system. :( We will be away from our beloved sun and we will be lost in outer space and then and only then we will freeze and die.  :D

That's not funny, People!! Danger is immanent. Earth relies on you and you must save it. So what can we do?

I think there are two solutions to this problem:
First,It is known that the sun is the heaviest plant in our solar system. So one thing we can do is simply we must hook earth to the sun witha chain  :D. So when the earth falls off, the sun will hold us still or we will drag it along with us and leave the other plants go figure.  :D
The other solution is to be able to travel faster the speed of light. Because if that happens people will be able to go back on time. So we will be able to say something like: our next meeting will be last Tuesday.  :D

The problem with this solutions though is that people might exploit this possibility. For example:
  • Kids will always go to stormy day to have an official day off from school.
  • Ladies will be able to redo their weddings until they are satisfied.
  • And if I don't win today, you know what will happen. :D So, Evaluator save yourself the pain. We don’t have to do this all day? :D
Now, The field that will be out of control by the year 20,000 is neuroscience: the science of the brain and how it works. Neuroscience will advance so much that we will be able to literally read someone thoughts, download other people thoughts, and erase bad memory by manipulation brain neurons and their connections. That will be great for quite people like me who doesn’t like to talk a lot.

I just love silence. I love to go home, play a blank CD, :D turn the volume all the way up, :D rewind my favourite part of it, :D and think of absolutely nothing. Even Toastmaster will become Thought-Masters because words won't matter anymore. A Thought master will have to come up to the stage, close his or her eyes, and the challenge is to think straight thoughts for 5 to 7 minutes.

Scientifically proven, Women and men struggle with this: ladies have zillions of thoughts running in there minds at a particular moment and men can have absolutely none. :D

So for instance: Ann could be sitting here listening to me, paying full attention, while thinking: I wonder: what brand is Hassan’s Shirt? :D Why doesn’t my husband wear something nice like that? :D Ohh I need to call my husband to put food for our fish? Hmm, do we need to put some water for it too? :S Well fish don’t get thirsty. :D Ohh my god, fish lives in water. :D Ohh Satan, you made me kill my fish? Satan.. What’s Satan’s last name? :D  and many other questions.

 Ann: you need to get some help.

While in the other hand: Bill could be sitting here staring at me with one question: What? what?   What's going on?

Bill please see Ann's doctor.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I just can't wait for the year 20000. I really can't wait for the year 20,000 so let's head back to reality.

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